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| These paintings are compiled by Babu T.N. Mukherji here |
In some
communities in the South, today is the day of Saraswati, the Goddess who symbolizes
the act and art of learning and knowing.
We each are
La Que Sabe, the Woman who Knows. Yet we spend a lifetime not believing and
owning that.
Culturally
and socially, via our families, we internalize and become various messages that
limit our possibilities.
The first
of these messages is that the ideal woman is sweet and good and quiet and doesn’t
challenge authority figures. We tamp and sculpt ourselves to fit into that
image, feeling terrible about the occasions when we don’t.
We mostly
don’t fit in because the preciousness that we are spills and pushes the boundaries
of those images. However, we want to somehow cut out those aspects and become
the prescribed ideal image.
We don’t succeed and exist in the limbo, between
the heaven of desiring to be what others want you to be and the hell of
discovering unearthly parts of yourself.
We sit
uncomfortable in our social settings, in our marriages, in our family, in
established workplace routines, in what the system educates, in our lifestyles,
in what we want to achieve. And dislike our disquiet, that sense of being
lonely in a crowd, amongst our loved ones.
We sigh and
look above to be relieved. Books, Guides, Courses/Rituals, Gods – that somehow
they will help you deal with the demanding disobedient shadows.
This is a
sign for you to undertake a journey to discover the other parts of your self.
Many women
don’t read/listen to these signs as we are uncomfortable to be uncomfortable.
Families, established social systems, existing communities, routines are
comforting. They are familiar and hence you can predict your environment
easily. We like to stay ensconced in it to be safe.
Worse,
sometimes eager to stay safe and unable to deal with the uncertain, we pull
down other women from their journeys. If you are afraid, work on it. Let other
sisters walk.
For those
of you who are willing to step into threshold spaces, not talk but act, develop
your inner voice and learn to trust signals emerging within you. That magical
way of walking through the day when you sense the other and environs. A bodily
flinch, a sense of heaviness, a tide rising, a light colour shining or
something else.
These
signals become sharp when you train your mind, detach and walk away from past,
and shudder into the unbounded moment. The more you challenge your assumptions
of your abilities and what you know and who you are, the more aligned you
become. When you are aligned, you have a clear signal that either encourages
you to move in a specific direction or warns.
Learn the
art of listening to these signals and acting on them. Acting is a tough area as
we have been conditioned to listen to others and not ourselves. Acting is also
a tough area when the signal warns us away from what we love to do or be
around. You may suffer, be miserable and frustrated.
We walk
alone in this Hera’s journey.
The Sa Ham
rituals will help as you navigate different areas unique to your journey. I
love NLP approach to master mind and body. I would recommend a full-fledged
training in NLP. Not just at the practitioner’s level but beyond to master the
area. Our gendered experience has provided tools and skills to enter certain
portals of knowing. Many of us haven’t owned it yet nor do we use it.
Become La
Que Sabe, the Woman who Knows.
Teach/share/guide
other women into their journeys. We don’t have enough women Masters to guide
women. We are shy of sharing what we already know, awkward to integrate our
experiences and teach others. Or wait for some weird stage of perfection before
we are willing to share. In the meantime, morons lay out bullshit confidently. Those
of us who have walked for long, this post is a call for you to step into Light.
Write,
Speak, Teach, Share.
Be
Saraswati.
You can read other posts of the Sa Ham - I am She (2017 series) here:
(1) Akaalbodhan
(2) Dashabhuja
(3) The Battle
(5) Identification
(6) she is She
(12) No Visarjan/Sa Ham
Reminds me of the Tagore song, Jodi tor daak shune keu naa aashe...! :)
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